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Dude Into Monogamy If it was your boyfriend's intent to reopen negotiations about monogamy while horny men circled you in a dark room, DIM, that wouldn't be okay.
There was a dark room in the basement of this gay bar, and my boyfriend wanted to check it out and I did not.
If you don't feel comfortable telling your doctor EVERYTHING you're doing "down there," you can find a new doctor—one you can breathe, relax, and open up to (in a different way)—under "find a provider" at
I'm a 35-year old straight male, engaged to my girlfriend of eight years.
Do it at a neutral time (a time when you can't have sex), so she doesn't feel like you're attempting to initiate by raising the subject.
First, ask her if she enjoyed oral when she allowed you to go down on her.
While we have a good sex life, she often won't let me finger or lick her.
What I really enjoyed was looking around, watching the girls dance and then picking one girl to take into a private booth, away from prying eyes where I could sit back and have her all to myself.